‘’Once I enter the class, I just feel like in the middle of nowhere’’: a narration of ESP teacher's emotional geographies

While studies on the teaching of English for specific purposes (ESP) in higher institutions have been widely explored, there is a paucity of research addressing how ESP teachers in higher education deal with their emotional geography when teaching ESP. The data of this present study were garnered through in-depth interviews and analyzed following Braun and Clarke’s (2014) thematic analysis. Anchored by Hargreaves' (2001) emotional geography, the study revealed that the participant had undergone negotiated emotional changes in his experiences as an ESP teacher, which were anchored by physical, social, moral, professional, and political aspects. The findings of this study informed that the participant experienced sustainable adaptation through negotiated emotional changes in his role as an ESP teacher in tertiary education. Furthermore, the present study revealed that ESP lecturer shows five aspects of emotional geographies. Understanding the results of the current study may encourage ESP teachers to handle their feelings when instructing with caution. The participant's stories in this study provide pedagogical insights for redesigning curriculum that focus on ESP learning. Policymakers could also use the results of this study to implement training programs for ESP teachers on how to


Introduction
The initiative to put up English for Specific Purposes (ESP) course has recently grown in higher education as a response to the current trajectory of English as a lingua franca and the goal for internationalization and globalization in education (Duong & Chua, 2016).Internationalization has been included in the long-term goals of higher education institutions around the world in order to engage in the economic, political, and technological processes of globalization, and Indonesia is no exception.Therefore, in this growing desire for internationalization and globalization in the education sector, Indonesia is one of the countries which put much concern on the use of English.This is because, in light of the challenges connected with the extremely widespread development of English over the world in recent decades, it has evolved to the status of an International Language.As a result, more and more colleges and universities around the globe are choosing to teach in English, especially at the graduate level (Barnard, 2014).
The demand for ESP among university students suggests that English for general purposes (EGP), which is taught in elementary, junior, and senior high schools, should have been the fundamental base.College and university students should have received ESP rather than EGP (Askar, 2013).According to higher education authorities, the long-established system of teaching English at Indonesian universities, EGP, should be replaced by ESP.EGP, or basic language learning, should be studied at a lower level rather than throughout college because English at universities should be ESP, which is more advanced, more specialized, and academic and matches students' majors of study, especially at universities where students are trained to perform on-the-job.Teachers of ESP should also assist pupils with their academic assignments.
Journal on English as a Foreign Language,13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088739-763 p-ISSN -1657;;e-ISSN 2502-6615 There are some reasons for ESP implementation two of which are the use of English as a global language (Kennedy, 2012) and the need to be involved in international regulations affairs and competitions (Cai, 2014).Traditional language instruction of ESP often places a strong emphasis on learning the language itself in order to help students become more proficient in speaking, reading, writing, and listening (Luo & Garner, 2017).A modification from General English (GE) to ESP, which is connected to a certain profession or specialty, imposes a new requirement because it calls on the instructor to at least have a working understanding of other subjects (Cai, 2014).Teachers of ESP are expected to employ a novel strategy that diverges from GE and is focused on linguistic communication (Luo & Garner, 2017).Teachers and students must learn how to contribute to a positive learning environment that supports each student's unique professional and personal circumstances.The student collaborates with the teacher as both a learner and a source of information and knowledge.
In his 2001 book, Emotional Geographies in Education, Hargreaves (2001) extended the idea of the term "emotional geography" used to describe spatial patterns and experiences of proximity and/or gaps in human interactions and relationships that help create, configure, and color the feelings and emotions we experience about ourselves, our world, and one another.According to Hargreaves (2001), the phrase "emotional geography" is "a concept that aids us in identifying the supports for and dangers to the basic emotional attachments and educational understandings that develop from forms of distance or proximity in people's interactions or relationships.This concept reveals the Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657;e-ISSN 2502-6615 students' motivation, which also makes it simpler to identify the beneficial and detrimental parts of their social interactions while they are studying.According to Hargreaves' (2001) view, every encounter and relationship between people has five key components.It is explained that various answers are composed of a variety of factors, including societal, moral, professional, political, and geographic factors.Hargreaves (1998) asserts that emotion is crucial because it affects how well lessons are taught in classrooms.In order to promote effective teaching, it is crucial to understand how emotions affect instructors' professionalism (Ubaidillah et al., 2023).In order to properly impart knowledge and engage in social interactions while juggling emotional demands, teachers must be able to effectively manage their emotions (Richards, 2022;Ubaidillah et al., 2023).According to Hargreaves (2001), teaching is more than just a cognitive and behavioral activity centered on what instructors should be able to do and know, hence understanding teacher emotion is essential.As mentioned by teacher emotion, it is crucial to understand how teachers feel when they are coping with their teaching practices.
Teacher emotion is described as a concept that shows the emotional health of a teacher and helps them anticipate scenarios.Basic emotional attachments are also a factor in this.Numerous social, cultural, and political elements can impact and shape teacher emotion (Chang & Taxer, 2021).Many studies have explored teacher emotion in various contexts, for example (Talbot & Mercer, 2018;Sukarsono et al., 2023;Sulistiyo et al., 2022;Ubaidillah et al., 2023) to name but a few.There is little research on EFL instructors' emotional geographies in teaching ESP despite the abundance of literature on teachers' emotional geographies.To explore an Indonesian ESP teacher's emotional geography as they are performed while teaching ESP in a tertiary institution, our study makes use of Hargreaves' (2001)

Emotional geographies
According to the literature, instructors experience a wide range of emotions, from negative to pleasant emotions (Buri & Frenzel, 2021).There are five main components of the geography of emotions, according to Hargreaves (2001): the physical/personal, social, moral, professional, and political dimensions.Based on these five characteristics, the current study also examined the emotional geography of ESP teachers.Hargreaves (2001) introduces the five aspects of emotional geographies, and they are explained in Table 1.

Table 1
Dimensions of emotional geography (Hargreaves, 2001) Emotional geography Dimensions of emotional geography

Physical geography
This dimension has an impact on social interactions that are limited by factors like emotional closeness in relationships between students, mentors, and other campus staff.The degree to which this emotional bond is demonstrated by the students' and ESP teachers' interpersonal strength significantly impacts the distance.

Sociocultural geography
This component offers a discourse of proximity or social inequity, which can put distance between students, teachers, and other campus groups due to differences in race, culture, gender, and disability, as well as variations in how to feel and express emotions.The ESP teachers will treat students in accordance with existing assumptions or sociocultural norms of EFL, and the ESP students belonging to non-English department majors may show different values and cultures, which may create tensions.

Moral geography
The language of social closeness or inequality is shaped by the moral standards and ideals that students, faculty, and other campus organizations adhere to when achieving aims and goals that may be incompatible with one another.Professional geography At this level, professional norms influence social interactions and relationships between faculty, students, and other campus groups.All campus community members, including professors and students, are expected to abide by certain professional norms.

Political geography
Intimacy or social difference among the college community is a result of hierarchical authority or power in this dimension.The management of the campus community, for instance, includes the enforcement of rules governing instructors' and students' online learning.

Emotional geographies in language teaching
Understanding teachers' emotions is crucial because teaching is more than just a cognitive and behavioral discipline concerned with what teachers should know and what they are capable of accomplishing (Hargreaves, 2001).Some recent studies have explored teachers' emotional feelings and how they react to it.Those studies deal with various aspects teachers may encounter.Those researches deal with teachers' emotional geographies during emergency remote teaching (Aladsani, 2022, Huang et al., 2023), teachers' emotional geographies as thesis supervisors (Sukarsono et al., 2023), in service teacher (Cowie, 2011;Liu, 2016), early childhood teacher's emotional geography (Clark, 2020), and pre service EFL teachers (Beneke et al., 2022;Imamyarta et al., 2023;Misdi et al., 2021).Although ESP has been taught in Indonesian higher institutions for many years, there is little information on the emotional geographies ESP teachers face in their ESP teaching.Thus, there is a need for a study dealing with the issue of teacher's emotional geography when teaching ESP in an Indonesian vocational higher institution.

Design
This project aimed to perform a narrative inquiry (Clandinin & Connelly, 2000;Connelly & Clandinin, 2006).To do this, we interviewed a male ESP teacher teaching at a university and collected narrative information from him.Humans "both live and communicate tales about their lives," according to Clandinin (2006), who created this design (p.44).A narrative inquiry approach is considered suitable for the study as a consequence.We acknowledge that narrative inquiry is arbitrary, but it captures the complex meanings in the stories that make up an in-depth analysis of the facts (Sudarwati et al., 2022).This enables researchers to create narrative interpretations because the message is communicated more effectively during interviews when participants are involved, articulate, perceptive, sincere, and creative.

Participants
The current study was carried out in the English Department of a private university in Indonesia, and it mainly focuses on the emotional geographies of one male participant who is an ESP teacher who taught ESP for non-English departments on campus.Doni (pseudonym) has been teaching ESP for 15 years.
Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657; e-ISSN 2502-6615 Doni was asked to share his experiences in teaching given that ESP teacher was categorized into five emotional geographies by Hargreaves' ( 2001) theory, which covered physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political geographies; the subject is deemed appropriate for use as examples of ESP teacher for his experiences.We sent Doni a consent form to complete, indicating his agreement to have all data distributed to resolve the project's ethical concerns.We ensured that the participant was aware of the study's objective and that ethical approval had been obtained to guarantee that his rights were protected and respected.Doni has signed consent forms attesting to his understanding of the study's purpose and his willingness to engage in it.
We also discussed our research objectives and the advantages of having others read the work.At the time when the study was conducted, Doni was the first author's colleague.In the present study, we invited Doni to participate voluntarily via direct communication.This recruitment method involved a convenient sampling as the participant is the first author's colleague.Thus, access to the participant was easily attained (Saumure & Given, 2008).

Data collection
To acquire empirical data, in-depth interviews were conducted (Eppich et al., 2019).Each smartphone face-to-face interview takes one hour to record.The interviews were conducted in the respondent's native language, Indonesian, to reduce misconceptions and increase our understanding of the subjects discussed in this study.We asked them about their emotional geographies as ESP teachers.Their physical, societal, moral, professional, and political experiences contribute to their emotional experiences.Then, we inquired as to how they addressed the situation.The information gleaned from these extensive virtual interviews was eventually transcribed in narrative form for additional research.The questions addressed in the interview session were: (1) 'How do you position yourself as an ESP teacher?' (2) Referring to emotional geography that a teacher might experience, have you ever been in that position?and (3) 'Could you describe it in terms of the following elements: physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political emotional geography?'

Data analysis
The six-theme analysis method developed by Braun and Clarke (2014) was utilized to analyze the data in this study.First, we familiarized ourselves with the recording by listening to the participant's illustrative experiences several times.In this section, we focused on the participant's key narratives.The narrative here is the five emotional geography aspects set by Hargreaves (2001).
Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657; e-ISSN 2502-6615 The interview recording was then transcribed, and we read it aloud numerous times to get a full comprehension of the information.To interpret the significant experiences of the participants, this component was implemented.Third, we went back and read the interview transcript in order to find patterns that matched our big idea before we began coding the data.Fourth, we analyzed similar utterances, expressions, and phrases before starting to code.Fifth, themes were developed following the analysis of the pertinent codes.This was accomplished by eliminating unnecessary codes.We used member checking (Merriam, 1998) in the data verification procedure to ensure the study's credibility.This was accomplished in the following steps: First, we encouraged the participant to review the data, remark on it, and provide suggestions.Second, we presented detailed summaries of our findings (Merriam, 1998;Yulianti & Mukminin, 2021).Third, we invited the co-author, who is also a disability studies lecturer and researcher, to review the final text to validate the flow and meaningbuilding.The co-author verified the applicability of the theoretical foundation behind disability and how this theory meets the participant's flow of stories, which can subsequently be connected by building the participant's identity during this phase.

Findings
This study was designed to explore the emotional experiences of a male ESP teacher teaching ESP at one of the universities in Indonesia.Based on the analysis results, it is known that his experiences when becoming an ESP teacher affected his emotional experience in five ways: physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political.These five aspects are explained following the emotional geography dimensions proposed by Hargreaves (2001).

Physical geography: "once I enter the class, I just feel like in the middle of nowhere"
Doni said that his biggest challenge while teaching ESP was how he could blend in with these students who were not majoring in English.He said that it took him a lot of effort to that the ESP class student could mingle with him so that he would have a close social bond.The hope is that when engagement has been created, it will be easy to create a fun learning environment.This often happens at the beginning of teaching ESP in the first months of the semester when the interaction between students and lecturer looks very stiff.He revealed:

Excerpt 1
The biggest challenge when teaching ESP is how to create a pleasant learning situation that can involve the active participation of students in learning.At the beginning of teaching, I always felt that I needed an effort to create closeness with them in learning.I just feel like a guest, and so once I enter the class, I just feel like I'm in the middle of nowhere.What I feel is that I feel that my distance from students is far.It is just like I am the teacher, and they are the students.
In addition, Doni said that he experienced extraordinary challenges in creating personal closeness with students due to one of the factors of unfamiliarity with lecturers who were not from the ESP student-faculty.When he was in the English education department, Doni was relatively familiar with the students, and his name was quite familiar among students.However, when teaching in non-English departments, students know him as a foreigner.Of course, this is normal if the relationship with students is usually less close at the beginning of the semester.

Excerpt 2
But, I have always realized that I am a lecturer who is not familiar with them, so it is only natural that students still feel awkward or keep their distance because physical closeness is one of them triggered by the frequency of meetings.
Furthermore, Doni also said that personal closeness with students began to be established around the middle of the semester so that the relationship between lecturer and students who were initially distant began to have interactions, and students began to seem relaxed.

Excerpt 3
Yes, usually, from the middle of the semester to the end of the semester, students are more relaxed in their relationships in class with their lecturers.The distance between lecturers and students is not too large anymore because the frequency of meetings that have occurred several times allows students to learn the character of the lecturer so that they are more relaxed and more active in class.

Sociocultural geography: "teaching ESP is like seeing the top of an iceberg"
In the interview, Doni said that ESP students in each department have unique attitudes and behaviors.Therefore, it can be said that students majoring in A do not always have the same habits as students majoring in B. When Doni teaches in the engineering department, the attitudes and culture of the students are different from those in the economics department.

Excerpt 4
At first, I was shocked to see students majoring in communications who were allowed to pick up the phone during class.There are also those who are allowed to collect assignments late because they are busy.Teaching ESP is like seeing the top of an iceberg.The longer she is there, the more she will see the many phenomena of attitudes shown by various students, where one major with another will have a different characteristic.
Other sociocultural factors can also be seen from the students' background.Students in non-English majors have diverse regional characteristics.For example, certain majors are dominated by students from metropolitan cities, so usually, students' values tend to be open and demand the democratization of learning.Students who are allowed to pick up the phone during class are triggered by the value of freedom they adhere to.Doni said he learned a lot about cultural values and attitudes when teaching ESP in non-English majors because the students were so unique.Further, he expressed:

Excerpt 5
Teaching ESP requires a lot of patience because you will usually discover new things out of the ordinary.Sometimes when we teach, it's not uncommon for students to chew gum on the grounds that they are sleepy.Some students come late with the excuse that there are student activities, and others protest with their final grades by submitting grade corrections when the grades have been decided.
Furthermore, Doni said that the nature of regionalism greatly influenced students' attitudes towards lecturers.ESP students from big cities tend to be outspoken and have less sensitivity and literacy in interacting with older people compared to students who socio-culturally still uphold the value of politeness.

Excerpt 6
The area where students come from usually shows the politeness and behavior of students.Usually, metropolitan students tend to speak straightforwardly without paying attention to who is being spoken to, but those from the outskirts still adhere to the value of politeness.

Sociocultural factors can also be seen in how these students communicate with lecturers directly and indirectly (via text messages and email). Students who are
Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657; e-ISSN 2502-6615 not majoring in English have different types of communication patterns between one major and another.Those who major in communication usually have outspoken characteristics.However, they still uphold the value of politeness, so they still consider the addressee or the person they are talking to.They talk politely when talking to the elderly or person with higher status.Doni said: Excerpt 7 I often find WA (WhatsApp messages) from ESP students who go straight without further ado, for example, stating their identity, name and needs but go straight to the intended subject.Of course, this shocked me in the beginning.Still, I often concluded that there needs to be some kind of socialization about procedures for communicating orally and in writing with lecturers on or off campus.I assume this happens because students are not literate about this; for example, they don't understand this.

Moral geography: "I am not just teaching, but I am responsible morally"
Doni said in an in-depth interview that his duties as a teacher do not only stop at teaching but also on aspects beyond that, namely that he also has a moral responsibility as a teacher.This moral responsibility is shown in various aspects, for example, his responsibility to teach and transfer knowledge to students properly and correctly.He stated:

Excerpt 8
My task as an educator is to transfer knowledge properly and correctly.I am morally responsible for making them understand the knowledge being learned.
It is very burdensome for me when their grades are not satisfactory, it means that morally I fail to be a good teacher because their inability to absorb the lessons I give indicates my inability to transfer knowledge.
Doni also said that apart from being morally responsible as a teacher, he is also morally responsible as an educator.He said that apart from imparting knowledge in the form of English, his other task was to provide ethics education to students so that students were not only qualified in terms of hard skills but also had good soft skills knowledge.If some students make mistakes in their behavior, he will not hesitate to admonish them in a good way so that in the future, students will not repeat them and they can become even better individuals.He stated: Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657; e-ISSN 2502-6615

Excerpt 9
It is not enough for the teacher to be a teacher; but educating is also very necessary because, as the saying goes, adapt first and then knowledge, which means that knowledge without ethics will only produce generations of generations who are ethically flawed and can later misuse the knowledge given.Therefore, it is very important for us as teachers to function not only as teachers but also as educators.Students' soft skills must be honed so that later, they are tough and resilient and have a strong mentality and ethics.If students make mistakes, I am responsible for letting them know what their mistakes are and how to fix them.

Professional geography: "I am trying to do my best in class"
As a teacher, Doni said that he always exerts extra effort to be professional as an ESP teacher.He prepared teaching stuff as best as he could, although sometimes, he needed to divide the syllabus along with the teaching materials as they were not available.Besides, he keeps himself updated with current technological advances in teaching to provide better teaching methods for students.He employed both face-to-face and online teaching to keep students motivated and get a variety of teaching methods.

Excerpt 10
I don't teach as it is, but there is always preparation beforehand, so even though the department doesn't provide me with specific training, I tried my best to learn how to teach ESP.I often don't have a syllabus or material; I always try to give my best to students so they can get knowledge properly and correctly.Therefore, I always prepare the syllabus and materials before I teach, even though sometimes it's really hard because I have to work hard.I often find ESP courses where the syllabus and teaching materials don't even exist, so I try hard to develop the syllabus and instructional materials so that they already exist when teaching.In addition, I am always updated with developments in teaching methods, so I adopted face-to-face and online meetings to provide variations in teaching to keep students motivated.
Doni also said although he has been teaching ESP for many years, he rarely does the so-called need analysis regarding the majors he was going to teach.Consequently, teaching ESP always gives him a kind of shock therapy because a lecturer has to be very super-powered to be ready to teach any major on campus, sometimes with a large number of students, for example, 50 students in one class.
Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088739-763 p-ISSN -1657;;e-ISSN 2502-6615 Excerpt 11 I faced the fact that I didn't understand the major at all, so I had to be self-taught to understand roughly what material I had to give.At the initial meeting, I usually only need to do a quick analysis, and then I have to be ready with the syllabus and teaching materials the following week.It's like creating magic for teaching ESP because I usually have to design RP teaching materials as well as what teaching techniques are like.I hope there will be ESP teaching training on campus so that lecturers like me are better prepared, not to mention class management, where ESP's classes are always large, which is also a challenge for me.
Furthermore, Doni said that what he always did at the beginning of class was that he always tried to evoke the students' agency, namely the students' expectations for the ESP course he was teaching which aims to create agency engagement in learning.Usually, lecturers apply a top-down approach where the lecturer decides on syllabus and material learning scenarios.Still, Doni prefers to apply a bottom-up approach where students also give their opinions on the learning they are doing.Doni also tried to create two-way communication that was done at the beginning of the semester with the hope that this would further help him achieve his learning goals.

Excerpt 12
At the beginning of class, I always invite them to get to know each other and ask them what their hopes are so that in the future, there will be extraordinary engagement in this ESP class.They want and hope to provide a substantial contribution to the success of the ESP class as students may feel that the class is not very decisive in the hands of the teacher, but it also involves students' voices.
Doni also always tries to be professional in grading students' assignments and work.He always tries to tell students what grades and assignments they are lacking.He always tries to do his best to be able to restore student work as media for reflection as well as for students to be able to measure their own abilities in the upper class of that course.He clarified:

Excerpt 13
I'm the type who always distributes work, assignments, grades, and any grades belonging to students as a medium for reflection for them to be able to evaluate their own abilities.This is also in anticipation that later, when there are students who protest grades, they will think again because they already know the grades.

Political geography: "I am open to any constructive feedback and criticism"
Political geography is the proximity and/or distance that result from disparate views of power, namely the viewpoints of those who occupy particular positions.ESP Many times, students may feel uncomfortable or afraid to criticize their instructors for fear of failing the class.However, Doni emphasized that as a teacher, he is very open to constructive input and criticism and asks his students to provide input when his performance is not as expected.

Excerpt 14
I said to them, if I'm wrong, please remind me.If I'm not clear, I can also be reminded to explain again.Even if I say too fast, please remind me.
Politically, Doni also showed his being firm and fair in making decisions on final grades.Doni said that he would not tolerate changes in the final score if that was already the result obtained from an objective assessment.However, Doni still opens a space for communication for students to be able to ask questions and refute grades, and he will provide justification for the grades given.But Doni refuses if there are students who want to improve grades when grades have been given with fair justification.He asserted:

Excerpt 15
I am a democratic type when giving grades and always try to be fair.If anyone asks about the value of the funds or argues, I will always serve and provide the correct justification.If there is an error in the value because of me, I am ready to help correct it, but if the value is final because the justification is correct, I will refuse to change it.I usually remind my students that even though I am a lecturer, sometimes I can misread, and my students know better.We are both learning.I do this because my role as a supervising professor is to direct students, not to dictate, and I want them to feel free to express notions and different viewpoints on what they believe should be explored together.

Discussion
Emotional geographies experienced by ESP lecturers teaching for non-English major touches all five aspects of Hargreaves' (2001) emotional geographies, covering physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political aspects.
Regarding emotional geography in the physical dimension, this discussion is more understood as a way of finding physical closeness or bonding between teacher and students.Here, Doni feels that extra effort is needed to build physical Journal on English as a Foreign Language, 13(2), 739-763 p-ISSN 2088-1657;e-ISSN 2502-6615 closeness with students for continuity of learning in class.This is in line with what Hargreaves (2000) said that physical closeness is very necessary for classroom endurance.Furthermore, Xu (2013) also said that this closeness needs to be built by playing the role of two-way communication between the teacher and students so that physical closeness can continue to be built so that students will be more active in class.In addition, the benefit of building physical closeness with students is to reduce teacher and student conflicts because physical closeness makes communication more perfect so conflicts and misunderstandings can be avoided (Mason et al., 2017;Yiu, 2013).
In the sociocultural aspect, there is a discrepancy between ways of communication between the old and young generations.Text messaging is very common between student and lecturer in academic environments.Doni found the use of bald on records frequently, which is confirmed by research written by Manipuspika and Sudarwati (2017), stating that students display a high degree of direct interaction with teachers via text messages.In examining what happened to Doni, this may vary in stages, and each stage shows the degree of severity.One of the incidents that Doni experienced was also influenced by the current generation's communication style which tends to be to the point and without preamble to give the impression of politeness to people with higher status.Therefore, in the case of Doni, what has happened, one of which is very much affected by the language of social media, where borders between old and young is very much disappeared.This is in line with Micheli (2015), who stated that there is a digital divide between the old and young generation in using media, one of which is in the ways of communication.Besides, what happened to Doni is also affected by the ethnicity factor where the students come from.In the context of academic performance, students' ethnicity plays a bigger role in affecting students' communication (Rienties et al., 2012), which may create culture shock (Kelly & Moogan, 2012;Roskell, 2013).Students' ethnicity may also contribute to how they communicate in the classroom and determine their pattern of communication with the addressee (Besterfield-Sacre et al., 2001;Hoang, 2008).This way, teachers teaching ESP should be more aware of the differences that students may exhibit.Thus, teachers need to have a certain kind of background knowledge on handling students of diverse multicultural backgrounds with multi-ethnicity (Anderson-Levitt, 2014;Yuan, 2018).
In the aspect of moral geography, it can be seen that Doni upholds his upright manner in teaching both as the teacher who teaches lessons and as an educator who serves the role of educating students.This is true because being a teacher actually brings certain moral standards that serve both roles as teacher and educator (Fenstermacher et al., 2009;Loughran & Menter, 2019).Therefore, it is all the more important that teacher educators bring such thinking to the surface in their teaching about teaching.Teaching is not just about the "doing" of teaching.It is also about the "why," -which leads to the development of informed and meaningful practice to enhance student learning (Loughran & Menter, 2019) and thus, teaching students values is also part of a teacher's moral conduct (Niesche & Haase, 2012;Willemse et al., 2005Willemse et al., , 2008)).
Professional geography is another aspect influencing teacher's emotions.In this case, an ESP teacher should be able to show the professional features of an educator.Literature has shown us that teaching ESP is very challenging.Doni, for example, had to be self-taught when he was assigned to teach ESP in a major he was very unfamiliar with.Another challenge that Doni faces is that ESP teaching materials are not yet available.In addition, there was no need for analysis to compile the syllabus and teaching materials, so Doni conducted a needs analysis at the first initial meeting and made a lesson plan and materials that had to be ready for the second meeting.This is, of course, very heavy for a lecturer's workload, which can trigger emotional tension.Doni's hope is that there can be teacher development and training for ESP teachers, for sometimes ESP teachers have to handle big classes.Training to be ESP teachers is also needed for ESP teachers will have good ESP teaching knowledge and know how to compile a syllabus, prepare materials, and manage class management, which Doni has been doing all this time self-taught because what he has just knowledge of teaching English in the English department, not in non-English departments.Despite this condition, an ESP teacher needs to be always well prepared and exert extra effort to provide a good teaching process (Celani, 2008).Besides that, apart from tensions and heavy workloads, a professional educator is ready to serve students (Krishnaveni & Anitha, 2007).The effort to create such a professional learning environment is very important, although they are in an inconvenient situation.A professional teacher also shows great responsibility in handling student scores for evaluation (Aluvalu et al., 2017).Therefore, ESP teachers must be provided with special training, knowledge, and practices before coming to real teaching (Ahmed, 2014;Basturkmen, 2019).
The political aspect of the lecturer's emotional geography experience shows the moderate nature of a lecturer for the freedom to express opinions in the dialogic process about the teaching and learning process.Doni shows a greater degree of tolerance for students' constructive feedback and criticism and provides a dialogic venue for assessment results.The process is a dialogic process between lecturers and students for the works created wide open, so the role of teacher and students in confirming the result of the student learning process is open wider.This is in line with Settiawana and Hilmawan (2016) who stated that transparency on students' scores will increase their learning, for students are able to monitor their own learning improvement.Therefore, it is necessary to always share and distribute students' scores on quizzes, tasks, and assignments.Besides, students' constructive feedback to teachers may also enhance teachers' performance throughout the teaching semester (Husain & Khan, 2016;Kane & Staiger, 2012;Scheeler et al., 2004) for student voice can be a powerful catalyst for teacher learning (Conner, 2022).

Conclusion
Since there is currently a paucity of understanding and expertise on how an ESP instructor manages his emotions during the ESP teaching process, this research is crucial.Using Hargreaves' emotional geographies theory, this study seeks to analyze the emotional geographies of ESP teachers when teaching ESP for non-English major.The study found five aspects of emotional dimensions suggested by Hargreaves (2001), namely physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political dimensions.
The study found that the participant underwent all five aspects of emotional geographies suggested by Hargreaves (2001), namely physical, sociocultural, moral, professional, and political dimensions.It is interesting to see that the instructors can control their emotions while having difficult jobs as ESP professors.How they respond to difficulties and issues that develop as a result of their teaching experiences demonstrates this.Since they were able to swiftly adapt to their responsibilities as ESP teachers, their actions showed that they had sufficient pedagogical knowledge and practices.Even though the participants must put in extra work to be competent and professional ESP teachers, the teachers exhibit professional conduct.
The results of this study are expected to offer further academic and nonacademic insights and information, especially for ESP instructors in higher education.Understanding the findings in the present study could motivate ESP English teachers to teach and deal with emotional manners.Stories shared by the participant in this study inform pedagogical impacts for re-designing curricula that specialize in ESP teaching.Policymakers could also take advantage of the present study's findings in the context of enacting training for teachers on how to treat ESP students effectively.
This study, it must be said, is far from perfect.Because of the narrative inquiry methodology used in this study, narrative data must be gathered.The development of an oral story involved the use of an interview.Interviewing is beneficial because it makes efficient use of time, among other factors.Oral interviews, on the other hand, can only give a synopsis of the events because of their brief duration.Not to mention that the story might not be told in chronological sequence due to interruptions and the subjects' performance on that particular day.According to the writers, written narratives are more trustworthy sources of information for the inquiry that follows, such as diaries and personal notes.The level of analysis corresponds to a richer narrative.
We are aware of the study's constraints, which include the use of only one person and a small number of data sources.Future studies might examine different genders and use more sources of information, giving the narrative more depth and complexity.The studies found that people can successfully adapt when presented with adversity during the teaching ESP process.